The Chocolate Cake Theory & How to use it in your sex life

If you were to ask a room full of people to list their favorite food, chances are that a lot of them would choose chocolate cake. Chocolate cake is yummy stuff, and chocolate cake lovers exist in huge numbers. But, if you took anyone who said that chocolate cake was their all-time favorite food and you forced them to eat nothing but chocolate cake forever, they would not be very happy at all. Chocolate cake is only special because you don’t eat it all the time. It tastes better than the other stuff you eat, but you don’t want to stop eating the other stuff. If you did, chocolate cake would no longer be special. It would no longer taste “better” because it would simply be the only thing you ever taste. You need the variety of tastes in order to have some that you like more than others. You need choices so you can compare one taste to another. Eat something that tastes bad, then eat chocolate cake, and the chocolate cake will taste even better.

That same principle applies to sex. I have my favorite sex moves, and yet I can’t stand to do them all the time. I like to do something new and different. After all, there was once a time when I had not yet known my favorite sex moves. There was a very special “first time” for each of sex acts. Manual stimulation, kissing, foreplay, penetration, a sex position, you name it. Trying out new other sex techniques gives me a chance to experience that great “first time” feeling again. I like that feeling! Besides, doing my favorite sex moves all the time makes them seem less special. I don’t want to ever get tired of my favorite moves, but I know I will if I do them all the time.

When you read the sex moves I recommend and do, you WILL read some suggestions you hate. When you do, you’re going to wonder, “Who does stuff like that?” If you think about chocolate cake, you’ll know the reason. By mixing everything together I’ve created contrasts that make everything on my reading list more interesting. If you try the moves in bed, the “boring” sex moves will even be worse, but the “pleasurable” moves would even be better, and the “mind blowing” moves would really be something special again.

Here’s something else to consider. You may find this hard to believe, but some people do not like chocolate cake at all! In fact, I’ll bet there are people in this world who absolutely hate chocolate cake! Now take any food you hate. For the sake of this discussion, let’s pick on brussel sprouts. You may hate brussel sprouts, but there are people out there who absolutely love them. They might go so far as to say that brussel sprouts are their favorite food.

Likewise, those sex moves I recommend and you absolutely hate are probably someone else’s favorite sex move! I know, that’s really hard to believe, especially for some of the things I recommend. It’s hard to imagine anyone who would like them, and yet, your partner craves that. If you are a man, long foreplay comes to mind. If you are a woman, enthusiasm during sex comes comes to mind.

Now, take that boring sex idea, try it in the bedroom, and follow it with one of your favorite sex move. I’ll bet that if you did this, your favorite sex move would feel even more special to you. It’s like getting a drink of cool water after walking across the hot desert for hours.

There’s another interesting way to look at these “boring” sex moves. Sometimes, the fact that they’re “boring” actually makes them good! For example, when I watch porn, it appears a bit phony to me. This is a problem I’ve had through the years with movies and plays too. Real couples don’t have sex like that. If a real couple actually tried to have sex like they do in porn, it would probably appear like the worst attempts on making a sex tape. But it would also appear REAL. If the sex is pleasurable, both of them are not going to pay any attention to how their bodies look on camera. No way! They are going to love the sex!

Many people automatically reject certain sex acts and moves. For example, I know many couples who love spicing up their sex life who tell me they absolutely hate roleplaying. But I also know that there are a bunch of roleplaying ideas I could suggest for them to try once for them that they would actually find interesting. They might never love that kind of play, but there are probably ideas within that kind of play that they could love.

So the next time you I suggest you try some “boring” sex move, really try it in bed. to you it may be boring but see if your partner is actually enjoying the said move. See if whatever makes it “boring” actually makes it seem more “real” to you. Then, when it’s over, see if the sex move that follows doesn’t feel a whole lot better than it would have without trying the boring first move. You might just discover a whole new world of sex moves you never thought you’d ever like!

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